First World Problems

I was taking a little down time to window shop on Etsy today. Because a girl can dream, I was reviewing all their Mother's Day jewelry suggestions. Wow, are there ever some beautiful and unique family birthstone rings. Excuse me while I wipe my drool.

Sadly, I will never have one. Not because money's tight or anything like that, but because my little family's stones would make one ugly ass ring. Zuul's an emerald, Subversive Dad is a pearl and I'm a peridot. Each on their own (well, maybe except mine), a lovely gem. But combined, no. Not even the most ironic hipster wasted on Pabst and downers could bring themselves to wear such a garish gemstone combination on any part of their body.

In fact, when Subversive Dad decided he wanted to propose to me, he thought it would be cute to get me a custom ring combined with both our gem stones. In theory, this was a very sweet thought, and had we been born on any other combination of months I would have been gushing and proud.

The jeweler politely redirected him with a touch of brutal honesty. If for any reason (aside the obvious ugliness factor) Subversive Dad decided he did not want the ring, the jeweler would never be able to sell it. Luckily, Subversive Dad regained his wits and remembered the ruby hint I dropped. If I ever meet the jeweler in my lifetime, I will kiss the man for not letting that horrendous mistake happen.

And now with an emerald amongst us, there still is not one attractive combination.

So, all sentimentality aside, I have to pass on that kind of family keepsake. Woe is me and a crappy May, June, August mismatch.