Introductions: a social conformity

Hi!  Welcome to my blog.  Please excuse me.  This is my first blog and, in my head, I thought this would be the place to share my unique observations and witticisms as a new mother.  However, here I am, staring at a screen, with everything that I thought about yesterday, when I came up with this brilliant scheme, tossed out the window of my mind.  If you call it mommy brain though, I will cut a bitch.

I'm sorry.  I didn't mean to offend.  Let me explain by way of introduction.  I'm not normal.  I'm not a normal mom, woman, human being.  In my opinion, "normal" is just a setting on a washing machine.  What makes me so unusual?  Apparently it's because I haven't been buying into all the neuvo parenting pressures, I mean "trends" and this seems to shock a lot of people.

Oh, sure, I sort of know about these ideologies.  This knowledge was kind of forced upon me though throughout my pregnancy with all these questions from all directions asking what my plans were.  Was I going to have a hospital birth, a home birth, a doctor, a midwife, a doula, a voodoo priestess.  Was I planning on attachment parenting, free range parenting, cosleeping, cry it out, no cry, breastfeeding, formula feeding, cloth or disposable diapering, or maybe I should just sell the baby to the highest bidder on eBay.  Because becoming a new parent isn't overwhelming enough.  It was information overkill and, eventually, I decided to just say screw it and follow my instincts like the human race has been doing quite well for a very long time.
  
And, here I am, 4 plus months into being a mom and the baby hasn't been taken away from me yet, so I guess I'm doing ok.  Oh, I'm sure some of you will read my anecdotes and categorize me as this, that or other type of parent and that's fine.  However, I just want to enjoy this phase of my life as much as possible without subscribing to any labels or pressures.  Is that so bad?  Well, from the looks of shock I get from other moms, apparently it is --- or it's just weird that I'm not a parental conformist.

Any way, I'm just here for the show.  Not to preach, not to give advice, not to pimp any products.  Just to laugh, cry and show you my WTF face.  So grab your popcorn and enjoy!