And could sew...
Ucreate: T-shirt Baby Bib Tutorial: I’m a sucker for upcycled t-shirt crafts…so I had to share this tutorial submission today with you by Better Life Bags …who is a guest ...
Sunday, 30 September 2012
Saturday, 29 September 2012
The thing about milestones....
September 27th, 2012: Zuul rolls over for the 1st time, back to front. I'm shouting from the rooftops excited. Proud momma is proud.
September 28th, 2012: Technique mastered. Zuul has to roll over within seconds of being laid down on her back every time. Problem is, she can't roll back and isn't one for tummy time. Seems like I'm running to her rescue often. Still, she's so proud.
September 29th, 2012: I'm so fucking over it.
September 28th, 2012: Technique mastered. Zuul has to roll over within seconds of being laid down on her back every time. Problem is, she can't roll back and isn't one for tummy time. Seems like I'm running to her rescue often. Still, she's so proud.
September 29th, 2012: I'm so fucking over it.
Monday, 24 September 2012
Baby Sing & Learn Class aka THUNDERDOME, Chapter one
I'm going to just come right out and say it. Mommy groups are my personal hell.
However, not wanting my daughter, we'll call her Zuul, to be a pariah like her mother, I started to bring her to a baby singalong at my local library. Plus, she'll be talking sooner rather than later, so I probably should stop singing and dancing along to the Teaches of Peaches before the complaints from other parents come in.
What I didn't know was they dedicate a portion of the class to mommy chit chat. O_o
As I approach the group, I immediately hear chanting in my head, "Two moms enter, one mom leaves!".
They're all in a circle, talking amongst themselves until I get there then, boom, silence and stare downs. I felt like turning around and running back home, but I wasn't there for me.
The mom who sits next to me has a 4 month old too. As soon as we learnt they were the same age she started listing off all the things her baby could already do. I guess I just don't get excited about anyone's baby, not even my own, sucking her bottom lip, however, she was acting like her baby just composed his first aria. At this point I realise she's not just making casual conversation, she's making comparisons. Ugh.
Judgy McJudgypants asks how nap times are going. I say "Naps are for suckers, right Zuul?". The look of shock was amusing, so I explain how she's refusing to nap the last couple of days. She responds, "Poor mom. Mine goes down every two hours." "Oh really?" I say, feigning interest. "Yeah, the first couple of days he'd scream for 20 minutes, but now he just babbles to himself until he sleeps." "Oh," I replied. "I still rock Zuul to sleep. " She was horrified. "My sister's a nurse. She said don't even start with that. Worst thing you can do."
Now, I hate all this judgement and pressure women put on each other, however, at this point, I am disengaging with her because she just implied I'm harming my child. Because being hugged too much was listed the number one reason why Jeffrey Dahmer started eating people, I'm sure.
Not only that, but worse. I too sucked into this judgemental vortex. I'm thinking to myself that her sister is a terribly mean nurse. This circle of hate has got to end!
Luckily, Zuul's shoes captured the attention the baby on the other side of us. Finally, someone I can relate to! Sure, she's 10 months old, but shoes! Fuck yeah! The light at the end of a boring tunnel. I believe the children are our future and my bet is on shoe fetish girl. I hope her and Zuul become BFF's, cause lord knows mommy's not making any new ones.
However, not wanting my daughter, we'll call her Zuul, to be a pariah like her mother, I started to bring her to a baby singalong at my local library. Plus, she'll be talking sooner rather than later, so I probably should stop singing and dancing along to the Teaches of Peaches before the complaints from other parents come in.
What I didn't know was they dedicate a portion of the class to mommy chit chat. O_o
As I approach the group, I immediately hear chanting in my head, "Two moms enter, one mom leaves!".
They're all in a circle, talking amongst themselves until I get there then, boom, silence and stare downs. I felt like turning around and running back home, but I wasn't there for me.
The mom who sits next to me has a 4 month old too. As soon as we learnt they were the same age she started listing off all the things her baby could already do. I guess I just don't get excited about anyone's baby, not even my own, sucking her bottom lip, however, she was acting like her baby just composed his first aria. At this point I realise she's not just making casual conversation, she's making comparisons. Ugh.
Judgy McJudgypants asks how nap times are going. I say "Naps are for suckers, right Zuul?". The look of shock was amusing, so I explain how she's refusing to nap the last couple of days. She responds, "Poor mom. Mine goes down every two hours." "Oh really?" I say, feigning interest. "Yeah, the first couple of days he'd scream for 20 minutes, but now he just babbles to himself until he sleeps." "Oh," I replied. "I still rock Zuul to sleep. " She was horrified. "My sister's a nurse. She said don't even start with that. Worst thing you can do."
Now, I hate all this judgement and pressure women put on each other, however, at this point, I am disengaging with her because she just implied I'm harming my child. Because being hugged too much was listed the number one reason why Jeffrey Dahmer started eating people, I'm sure.
Not only that, but worse. I too sucked into this judgemental vortex. I'm thinking to myself that her sister is a terribly mean nurse. This circle of hate has got to end!
Luckily, Zuul's shoes captured the attention the baby on the other side of us. Finally, someone I can relate to! Sure, she's 10 months old, but shoes! Fuck yeah! The light at the end of a boring tunnel. I believe the children are our future and my bet is on shoe fetish girl. I hope her and Zuul become BFF's, cause lord knows mommy's not making any new ones.
Saturday, 22 September 2012
Introductions: a social conformity
Hi! Welcome to my blog. Please excuse me. This is my first blog and, in my head, I thought this would be the place to share my unique observations and witticisms as a new mother. However, here I am, staring at a screen, with everything that I thought about yesterday, when I came up with this brilliant scheme, tossed out the window of my mind. If you call it mommy brain though, I will cut a bitch.
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend. Let me explain by way of introduction. I'm not normal. I'm not a normal mom, woman, human being. In my opinion, "normal" is just a setting on a washing machine. What makes me so unusual? Apparently it's because I haven't been buying into all the neuvo parenting pressures, I mean "trends" and this seems to shock a lot of people.
Oh, sure, I sort of know about these ideologies. This knowledge was kind of forced upon me though throughout my pregnancy with all these questions from all directions asking what my plans were. Was I going to have a hospital birth, a home birth, a doctor, a midwife, a doula, a voodoo priestess. Was I planning on attachment parenting, free range parenting, cosleeping, cry it out, no cry, breastfeeding, formula feeding, cloth or disposable diapering, or maybe I should just sell the baby to the highest bidder on eBay. Because becoming a new parent isn't overwhelming enough. It was information overkill and, eventually, I decided to just say screw it and follow my instincts like the human race has been doing quite well for a very long time.
And, here I am, 4 plus months into being a mom and the baby hasn't been taken away from me yet, so I guess I'm doing ok. Oh, I'm sure some of you will read my anecdotes and categorize me as this, that or other type of parent and that's fine. However, I just want to enjoy this phase of my life as much as possible without subscribing to any labels or pressures. Is that so bad? Well, from the looks of shock I get from other moms, apparently it is --- or it's just weird that I'm not a parental conformist.
Any way, I'm just here for the show. Not to preach, not to give advice, not to pimp any products. Just to laugh, cry and show you my WTF face. So grab your popcorn and enjoy!
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend. Let me explain by way of introduction. I'm not normal. I'm not a normal mom, woman, human being. In my opinion, "normal" is just a setting on a washing machine. What makes me so unusual? Apparently it's because I haven't been buying into all the neuvo parenting pressures, I mean "trends" and this seems to shock a lot of people.
Oh, sure, I sort of know about these ideologies. This knowledge was kind of forced upon me though throughout my pregnancy with all these questions from all directions asking what my plans were. Was I going to have a hospital birth, a home birth, a doctor, a midwife, a doula, a voodoo priestess. Was I planning on attachment parenting, free range parenting, cosleeping, cry it out, no cry, breastfeeding, formula feeding, cloth or disposable diapering, or maybe I should just sell the baby to the highest bidder on eBay. Because becoming a new parent isn't overwhelming enough. It was information overkill and, eventually, I decided to just say screw it and follow my instincts like the human race has been doing quite well for a very long time.
And, here I am, 4 plus months into being a mom and the baby hasn't been taken away from me yet, so I guess I'm doing ok. Oh, I'm sure some of you will read my anecdotes and categorize me as this, that or other type of parent and that's fine. However, I just want to enjoy this phase of my life as much as possible without subscribing to any labels or pressures. Is that so bad? Well, from the looks of shock I get from other moms, apparently it is --- or it's just weird that I'm not a parental conformist.
Any way, I'm just here for the show. Not to preach, not to give advice, not to pimp any products. Just to laugh, cry and show you my WTF face. So grab your popcorn and enjoy!
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